Below Minnesota, Just Above Hell

It's Iowa week. If there's one thing I know everything about, it's Iowa. One year later, we return to the truth vacuum. Hey girl.



A mysterious trend has risen in the college football world since the advent of the BCS: conference pride. People from all over the country are cheering on their in-conference foes against out-of-conference opponents. It's a unique phenomenon. I don't think it exists in pro sports, unless the northeastern conferences I follow are especially bloodthirsty and fans everywhere else are pulling for their hated rivals (possible).

I don't want to place the blame for this on the fans, the BCS' knighting of six "Big" conferences that would receive automatic bids to major bowl games united and divided fan bases in a way we've never seen before. There is no longer rooting for your team, there is a hierarchy: root for your team first and your conference second. You not only have to win, you have to get respect from the media for your wins.

Come bowl season the most common stat you will see on TV is the bowl record by conference. I understand that. It becomes a geographic thing, the south loves that they have the best football (they do). But all this comes at a cost. Two weeks ago I left my cubicle early on a Friday to embark on the trip to Tuscaloosa, and as I'm leaving the woman next to me who has Gator stickers all over her cube says, "Have fun! But you know I have to cheer for Alabama, with the SEC and all."



No. We have gotten away from our core values of cheering for a TEAM. Enough patchwork fanship. You can't fake this stuff. I've been talking about this with friends of mine recently and you just feel how you feel, you don't suddenly muster up appreciation for a program on any given Saturday because it's advantageous to your conference.

Heartbreak is the lifeblood of rivalries. The fact that we have a trophy game with Michigan State doesn't change the fact that they've never taken from us. The fact that Lloyd Carr begged a ref for - and was rewarded with - two seconds in 2005 makes me want to beat Michigan. The fact that my car was towed in Alabama makes me want to stomp the low tide in State College next year. And in a brief but virtuous return to my thesis of last year's post, the fact that Iowa is still a state makes me want to beat them this year. I would never cheer for these teams under any circumstances.

Iowa has disrupted the natural order of things in 7 of the last 8 meetings with Penn State. Ferentz is a very good coach, but has had trouble getting consistent play out of his team in the last two years. They may have even underachieved during that time! Fans of the Hawkeyes would not have you believe it though, they flood message boards like water floods Iowa with diagonal comparisons and selective memory like they have already sewn up last and next year's conference championship. Like the lovebugs that are swarming Florida at the moment, they are acidic and disgusting.


Agh, so gross. Who even moves to Iowa? How does the state maintain a population? If every family has two children, you have to figure one of them is thinking, "I'm getting the hell out of here" and does it, which would indicate a steady decline. Yet they seem to be hovering around 3 million people. Incredible! The internet and the travel channel have probably made it easier for Iowans to cope with their situation. Youtube videos of beaches are only a 20 minute 56k download away! Grab your sunscreen! When you all vacation, I hope it's in Canada. Thanks for the salmonella.

As you can tell I don't really feel like writing about football because we are probably going to lose this weekend, and it sucks. I don't have a more elegant way of putting it. I'll never forget where I was or how I felt after the last two Iowa losses and I'm not looking forward to it again. 2008 hurt the most because there was national title hopes at stake. 2009 was a complete meltdown, my reward for dropping hundreds of dollars to be in attendance for what I had hoped would be payback.

Despite my acknowledgement that this is a rebuilding year, I want this to be a must win on a personal level. I just want to beat this team, I don't care how. I would take a fluke loss to Indiana over an expected loss to the Hawkeyes. However I am a realist, so Just in case we don't win, here are ways that the state can make it up to me:

*Adrian Clayborn: Get drafted by the Giants and be a bust. And then get busted for cocaine.

*Ricky Stanzi: Admit that you have no idea what's going on in a football game.

*Kirk Ferentz: Suggest Ricky Stanzi watch tape of Jake Christensen.

*Matt Hayek (Mayor, Iowa City, IA): Give me the keys to the city.

*Adam Robinson: Day-drink before the game and puke on DJK in the 1st quarter.

------------------

The Pick:

Iowa 26
Penn State 13

We force punts on half of their possessions and limit them to below 30 points, but it is our offense that can't find it's rhythm until it's too late. Bolden only throws one pick this game but the running game offers little support as a veteran defensive line is crushes Royster in a big game. It's not going to matter that they only have one running back, we can't stop one running back. Kill me now.

Big 10 Divisions Announced

The Big Ten conference revealed their division alignments today. You can watch the Big Ten Networks coverage of it above. Here are the things you need to know about the decision:

Conference Layout
--------------

Division A (no names yet)
Illinois
Indiana
Ohio State
Penn State
Purdue
Wisconsin

Division B
Iowa
Michigan
Michigan State
Nebraska
Minnesota
Northwestern

No real knee-jerk reactions to this set up. They did the right thing in making sure Penn State, Ohio State, Michigan and Nebraska were split two and two. Putting three of those programs in one division would upset the competitive balance (Michigan has to be good again eventually, right?) The next "tier" in the conference has always been Wisky and Iowa, both are strong programs but not quite as nationally recognized as the top four, and I liked to see that they were separated as well. At first glance one would have to say that Division A is going to be stronger in the immediate future as Wisconsin is primed for a conference championship run and Michigan is still sitting on the Rod. Delany also confirmed that the name of the conference will remain the "Big Ten" despite having 12 teams and that they will reveal a new logo in the near future.

Scheduling
--------------

*8 conference games per season, with one bye week.

*Each team plays everyone in their division every season

*Each team has one protected crossover from the other division that they will play every year

*Two teams from the other division will be on your schedule for two years at a time, and then rotate out. This is the only inconsistent aspect of the scheduling. After accounting for the protected crossover game, there are five conference opponents in the opposite division that need to rotate in and out of the schedule. Meaning that after a team is on your schedule for two years, they will be off the schedule for two or FOUR years depending on how the rotation is set up. More on this later.

*Michigan vs. Ohio State will still be the last regular season game for the next two years.

Protected Crossovers
--------------

"Protected crossover" meaning each team has one team from the opposite division that they play every year.

Ohio State - Michigan
Everyone knew this was going to happen, this a move they had to make otherwise Michigan and Ohio State fans might have actually united to protest the move. Gross, no one wants to see that. For now, Ohio State is in a great position because they get to keep their coveted rivalry on their coveted weekend, but they also get to keep winning it.

Penn State - Nebraska
This is what I wanted. Penn State really doesn't have a true rival in the conference, and this one won't feel like a rivalry at first but if it proves to be competitive maybe we can drum up the "two newest members" angle? If not, there's always this, or this. Either way it's bound to be a good game more often than not and I'm already looking for an excuse to get out to Lincoln one year...

Wisconsin - Minnesota
This was another must have. The oldest and most played rivalry in college football and Minnesota actually seems to be turning their program around. We know it as the "Battle for Paul Bunyon's Axe" but they used to play for the "Slab of Bacon" which was actually a piece of wood with a carved "W" or "M" on it, depending on how you hung it. It was lost in the 1940s and found in a Wisconsin storage room in the 1990s. Wisconsin now has it in a glass case despite losing the series to Minny 11-3. Barry, put away the Axe and bring back the Bacon, fantastic trophy.

Illinois - Northwestern
No more "Sweet Sioux Tomahawk", as of last year they are playing for the "Land of Lincoln" trophy after the NCAA banned all Native American imagery from college athletics. Unless Illinois gets rid of Ron Zook I see this matchup heavily favoring Northwestern. Pat Fitzgerald is really starting something up there. Interesting side note: I recently read that if Penn State were to go outside the program for Joe's replacement, Fitzgerald is someone they would consider. Go Tom Bradley.

Indiana - Michigan State
Did anyone know this was a trophy game. No? Well here it is:

Now go ahead and forget all over again...

Purdue - Iowa
Attention Iowans! Let's let bygones be bygones, you have my sympathy. While this is a matchup you should be able to win consistently, you were part of a solid three way rivalry between Wisconsin and Minnesota that has just been disrupted. As the extreme northwest of the old Big 10, these three border rivals were able to maintain a competitive balance for over 100 years, and that is something that I am sad to see go. Not to mention with Minnesota's new TCF Bank stadium we were poised for some outstanding cold weather in future Novembers. There will be periods of four years when the Hawkeyes will not play Wisconsin. To me that's the biggest injustice with the new divisions.

--------------

I like the divisions and I think that Penn State landed in the right spot. If there was one team I wanted to play every year it was the Buckeyes because although we'll never enter Michigan's circle of hell in their eyes, they are our only border state and now they won't be able to share conference championships with us after we beat them head to head. The conference has definitely gotten stronger with the addition of Nebraska and we should be hearing less Big Ten bashing now that the road to a Big Ten championship becomes much more difficult with the addition of a conference championship game. Anytime you have to see less of this you know it's been a successful offseason:

Facing the Music

I'm sitting here as PTI wraps up and the bottom border of ESPN flashes "COLLEGE FOOTBALL LIVE NEXT." I'm not going to watch it, I know Penn State will only be discussed in the context of Saturday evening's game, and I've had that conversation as honestly as I can with myself about 10 times since the game. Here's where I'm at:

There's really only one short bright stretch to this game, right? The first 10 minutes. 3 and out, first offensive play from scrimmage TD, tack on a field goal to that and we have a double digit lead. At this point, I'm thinking, "We look good," the coaches were thinking, "Let's slow this down," and Iowa was thinking, "This is familiar." From that point on we took the liberty of lowering the shotgun to the top of our foot and firing away. Not to say we didn't deserve to lose, we did, but the way we did made me sick to my stomach.

Firstly, before I proceed to make myself as miserable as possible with an in house analysis, Iowa is better than us. They abused us with the running game and capitalized off our turnovers and limited their own. When I say they deserved to win, I mean it.

Our offensive line is bad, every kind of bad. They were physically overmatched, communicated poorly, and they blew assignments. Iowa's D line had them for dinner, Clark had defenders in his face almost every time he dropped back and the run game looked like its 2009 familiar self. The 0 sacks surrendered is more of a testament to Daryll's mobility than to the line. About Daryll's mobility...

USE IT!!!! That 1st interception thrown absolutely killed me, it's 3rd and 2, hes rolling right, he weighs 245 and he has a good 5 yards of field in front of him. Tuck the ball and get it. Instead he opted to throw the short out (more on these later) and it got picked. He claims the ball slipped, and I might believe him, but the ball wouldn't have slipped if he had chosen to use his legs instead of forcing it. We are running Clark with more caution this year because of the absence of depth at QB, but if you can get a first down and then slide that's a play any QB should make, whether it's DC or Kerry Collins. The dual threat quarterback is DEADLY in college football and the "Spread HD" is at its best when we have a quarterback willing to run. Without one we are the predictable, containable offenses of 2006, 2007 and apparently 2009. That really showed on Saturday with all the passes to the sidelines, the "movement" of the pocket that looks fancy but doesn't fool anyone, the stubborn scheme that changes like the weather in Orlando. We did not challenge the middle of the field, we did little to impede Iowa's pass rush, and when we did Royster dropped the screen pass that would've gone for a first down. Shotgun! Clark has to throw the ball 20 yards laterally to gain 3 yards in this system. The safeties can cheat to the sidelines against this system. We can go 8-4 with this system.

This game was a nightmare from the past, a step backward. I wish we would've lost differently, all the usual gripes that went dormant last year resurfaced on Saturday. Last year we didn't know what we had in our offense and we played hungrier, calling whatever it took to win. This time we wanted to win on some bogus terms, we were determined to play a certain style of football and if that wasn't enough, so be it. I'm more upset with the coaches than anything here, we are so easy to play against in big regular season games. We have a few scripted plays and then we reel it in the rest of the game, trying to grind it out instead of going and getting the W. We ran a 3 back Power-I formation twice on Saturday, and both times we ran a counter with Chaz Powell. The first time it gained 8 yards and the second time it gained 0. That formation wasn't anywhere to be seen the rest of the game, the ONLY look the D had at it was the play that we ran twice. We could've play action passed, we could've faked the counter and ran Royster straight ahead, but we went with what was comfortable, what was familiar. That's the recurring theme that has killed me watching this team over the years. We won't always have the talent to comfortably beat teams the way that we want to, sometimes we have to adjust. And why wouldn't we? Why wouldn't we do everything in our power to win the game at hand and keep the title dream alive? I'm tired of playing not to lose. To show you how much this hurts I'm going to quote the original protagonist of this dressed up conservative offense Anthony Morelli when he said, "The defense isn't going to give us anything, we have to take it."