Friday, December 31, 2010

The WeNeverGraduate Sun Bowl Drinking Game

New Year's Eve is going to start a little early this year for many Fighting Irish fans thanks to a 2pm kickoff against the Artists Formerly Known as Convicts and Still Known as Candidates for Derek Zoolander's School for Kids Who Can't Read Too Good.

I'll be taking in the game from the friendly confines of my college roommate Brad "They Call Me Mr. Balls" Blomstrom's house, the same place we watched the Irish knock off Southern Cal over Thanksgiving Weekend. We figured this momentous end of the year showdown deserved some special treatment. Our answer? A drinking game of course.

Drumroll Please...

* Any camera shots of Juarez, mentions of a donkey show, or mentions of how the players had their passports got revoked results in a drink of Dos Equis.

* Any mention of Duval Kamara: go around the room and name individuals who were one year rock stars from college (people who put forth one great year and then vanished into party oblivion). The first person who hesitates has to take a drink.

* Any mention of Kelly at Cincinnati: first person to say “the chlli capital of the woild” tells anybody else to chug a Dos Equis. The chugger becomes the Chili Boy. If a sombrero is available then they should be forced to wear it. The Chili Boy is tasked with getting the entire room food until the next Cincinnati reference where the process starts again.

* Anytime a player is shown moping on the sideline, yelling at a coach or his quarterback then the group chooses a girl to take a drink for entering a “glass case of emotion.”

* Drink anytime Verne mentions the following:
- the SEC
- Charlie Weis or Randy Shannon
- References the 3-0 2008 game featuring Dave Wannstedt
- Chris Stewart is in law school
- Cam Newton

* If there’s a fight in the tunnel all must scream in a Lou Holtz voice “SAVE JIMMY JOHNSON’S ASS FOR ME” and shotgun a beer.

* Double-barrel shotgun if someone stomps on someone like Brandon Meriweather in the FIU brawl.

* Any time a Jewish player makes a play it’s time for 8 crazy shotguns.

* Verne says the wrong name of a player, first person to correct him gets to tell someone else to drink. If they are wrong, they must drink.

* Every Irish touchdown results in a shotgun “For the Love of the Game” Style.

* Every time Verne Lundquist laughs for more than a second, last person to yell "Shut the &%$# up Verne" has to drink, and the first person to yell becomes the Old Grand Dad. The Old Grand Dad has the power to do two things:

- At any mention of Miami in the 1980's or the ESPN 30 for 30 Documentary, the Old Grand Dad becomes the grand dad of 1980's Miami football, Luther Campbell of 2 Live Crew. Thus, he gets to tell one person "Face Down, Ass Up," and that person must take a shot of Bold Grand Dad and watch the game with their face on the floor and their ass in the air until the next commercial break.
- Any crowd shot of ND football grand dad Joe Montana or his son means the Old Grand Dad gets to tell one person to play the "Chicken Soup Game." Said player will pour a beer into a bowl, and has one minute to drink it all with a spoon during the next commercial break. Should he fail, he receives a shot of Bold.




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