Saturday, July 24, 2010

Dynasty League Update: Mattare 1, Bill 0

Well the first showdown in our NCAA Football 2011 Online Dynasty is in the books and poor Billy Boy is reeling. My Wake Forest Demon Deacons ran all over Bill's Dukies en route to a 42-31 victory in week two. Bill had installed himself as a 7-point pregame favorite but just could not stop the deadly combination of RB Josh Adams and QB Tony Sachitas. Postgame Bill seemed to offer up a million excuses for the loss, but provided no reason for why he couldn't find a way to defeat an opponent so far below his level. Bummer.

Perhaps more importantly than what this means within our dynasty is what it means in the real world. As is customary whenever teams Bill and I root for/control play against one another we had to have a side bet. Previous bets have led to:

* ND-PSU '06 - Billy relinquishing control of his Facebook profile for 3 months (I may have enrolled him in every gay club at Penn State and given his real cell number)
* ND-PSU '07 - Me being forced to wear a little pink dress out on New Year's Eve in Philly (I may have gotten jumped outside the bar Finnegan's Wake)
* ND-PSU NIT Semifinal '09 - Me being forced to do on-demand pushups (30 a day) for the rest of the year (I may have done most of them on the floor of PJ Whelihan's)

The stakes for this video game showdown: 3 on-demand yoga poses per day the next extended period of time we see each other. That means whenever I feel like Bill needs to stretch out a bit--it could be in a bar, it could be at a restaurant, it could be on the beach, it doesn't matter--with the snap of my fingers he'll be in the tree pose or perhaps "the plow"...because there's never an inappropriate time to whip that one out.

Probably the most enjoyable part will be listening to Billy explain to bystanders why he is doing the downward-facing dog yoga pose in the middle of a crowded bar and then rant on about how he's actually the better player. Bystanders will respond "well, judging by the fact that you're posing like Daniel-Son in the Karate Kid as you talk to that girl and the guy you played is standing there laughing I'd say you probably aren't the better player." Those bystanders would be correct.

Better luck next year Billy Boy! In the meantime, better start working on that flexibility.

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